It's Mother's Day and as usual, mama was mad when we arrived, had the ugly face on and said how mad she was. (what else is new) She said she had to go pee and I told her to go and she said she can’t ‘cause she didn’t know where to go or have anyone to care for her because I wouldn’t stay there. I called an aid and they took her. We tried to give her gifts and let her know it was Mother’s Day, but she never understood. I just put her gifts up in her room. Her hearing aids were ringing nonstop because her ears are full of wax again and we will have to have them come and clean them again. There were a lot of people there since it was mother’s day. Mama was bothered by the noise. Mama was eating a cookie and I said she needed a napkin and she said, no, I will just use my shirt and pulled it up and I said, “NO , don’t wipe on your clothes.” These people, will wipe on whatever they have, eat after whoever hands them something, eat something they find laying on the table, take someone else’s gum ,it’s really gross. Mama wanted to know if this was upstairs or down and they have but one floor.

It was time again for family night and we all came. I wonder why, cause mama doesn’t know we were there 5 minutes after it’s over and tonight was the same. Mama ate pretty good tonight but tried to give it to everyone else first. She knew we were there while we were sitting at table and kept saying” how many of us is it?” We would tell her how many were there and in 1 minute, she would start asking again. Then we would tell her a different number each time to see if she knew the difference and she never did. We could say 15 or 50 and she would just say, that’s a lot, and we would all laugh. Trinity ( her grandson) sang and played his guitar but she didn’t know who it was. After supper and entertainment, everyone left but me and Irv, and we went to mama’s room and found two ladies in there. We had to tell them that it wasn’t their room and get them out and put mama in. So many of them don’t know which room is theirs and will go in someone else’s room and get stuff and it’s gross if you think about what they can do. I found a shirt at Wal-mart, that said, I’m Bored, in big letters on the front. Mama couldn’t read it but everyone thought it was so funny when she wore it and sat and hollered, “I’m bored.” They would put it on her a lot. I took her to the bathroom and her roommate said, “I’m so hungry, I haven’t had anything to eat or drink all day.” She’s on a feeding tube and never eats. The aid said, “They paired them up good didn’t they.”

Saturday, Bill went and got mama and took her riding to Sonic. When he took her back, she asked if they were going home and he told her she was home and she told him she thought she was still at Wal-Mart. He asked her who he was and she looked at him and said” I don’t know?” Yesterday she had thought he was Nolen (her dead brother) and today she didn’t know who he was. He told her, I’m your son, Bill. She said,” I don’t have a son.” I got there today and mama told me the biggest story about how her roommate passed out and they had to take her someplace and she sure hoped she would be ok. I asked the nurse and she told me that nothing happened to the roommate and she was the same as usual.

I sat and fed mama cookies because she couldn’t see them to pick them up. She said they looked like pills. They were Oreo’s. Blake was there and took mama to her room because she said she had to the bathroom. He left her with the aid and came back. We waited and waited and finally went to look for her and she was way off down the hall. I asked her what she was doing and she said” I was lost, someone pushed me off and left me and I tried to tell her that she had gone to the bathroom and Blake had taken her but he didn’t push her down there, she pushed herself. It didn’t do any good.

Things rolled along and it’s into June. Mama’s roommate was crying and praying for God to take her home so she didn’t have to hurt anymore. The poor lady hurts all the time, she can‘t get up at all. Blake walked in and I told him that Marion hurt all the time and he listened to her pray and he said, Granny, I feel so sorry for her and I said so do I. I feel so sorry for these people that have no life and no choice, but sit and hurt. It least mama isn’t hurting. Blake was playing with mama and holding up his fingers and asking her how many he had up. She would get it wrong each time, she couldn’t see. He would say, “hi mommo” and she would say, “Where are you?” She just can’t see. The poor lady that always hollered, ”I’m dying”, died today at 102. She finally got her wish. Someone dies ever few days here, it seems. That’s very depressing and I’m glad that mama doesn’t know it. They have lost so many since we have been here. Ms Judi died and so did Opal.

Today, mama was eating grapes and she would chew up some and then turn her head and spit. I hate that. I tell her not to spit but she does it again on the very next grape. The whole floor was covered around her chair. When we got here, her hearing aids were in the wrong ears and upside down. I hate to complain but it’s pretty bad when you can’t put the red one in the right ear and we even wrote it on the wall in her room. I had to go, and I gave her the cup with the rest of the grapes and left her spitting. When we got there on this day, mama had it in her head that Doc was in the bed in her room and wouldn’t talk to her. He hadn’t’ even been there. He’s coming next week but she doesn’t know it. She keeps asking “Then who is the guy in my room?” I would tell her there’s no man in your room. I took her in her room and she said ,“Who’s that” and I said,” Marion “( her roommate)and she says, “I don’t know her”. Mama stays in her room most of the time unless we’re there ,with Marion and they entertain each other. Neither have any sense, and they talk about the good old days, sing and pray. The only thing is neither can remember, hear or see. Marion still thinks she’s in her house and will tell you to sit down and she will go fix coffee. She can’t get out of bed at all and is hooked up to a IV all the time. She can’t eat.

When we got to mama’s room today, we heard her and Marion talking. Marion tells mama what to do and mama does it, no matter what it is. We stood and listen and watched as mama opened the bathroom door and Marion said, I don’t like that, shut it and mama tried to shut it, and then Marion says, I want it open and this when on till I reached in and pulled mama out. I hate she has no sense. The nurse told us that before lunch mama and Mr. Manning were singing. Mama’s voice isn’t good anymore but she still tries to sing and can remember all the words to the old church songs. Isn’t that weird. That’s all she knows. Later, I asked mama to sing something for me and she started singing, Just Molly and me and baby makes three, and ,she could remember all those words too. Bless her old heart. She just keeps on trying and I loved to hear her sing again. Of course it made me cry. The next day mama still remembered Molly and Me and still could sing it. That’s really something, when she can’t remember anything else.