Our phone rang at 5:30 am. We were sleeping. It was mama( I don’t know how she called this time). She told me that 2 black women were in her house banging around and she was scared. I told her I would be right there and I got dressed and went. NO one would admit to dialing my number for her. Anyway, she told me that these 2 black women had followed her home from the hospital and were in her house. I told her, NO, you are fine, I talked to the nurses and they said she had tried to get out of bed between the rails and they had put her back, and then she had dialed the operator all night on the phone. She couldn’t push the call button, but she can call the operator all night and tell them she needs help. Strangest thing. She told me she remembered getting ready for church.( when I don’t know) She told me about the nurse inflicting such awful pain on her with that awful (BP) machine. She can’t stand them hurting her arm like that.

Doctor Jadic came in at 9 and signed her out ( I’ll bet the nurses were having a party) .We arrived at Hudson about 11am in the Hudson van. She was so scared. We had brought pictures and her bedspread and her chair, her CD player, from her house, and tried to make her room feel homey for her, but she didn’t care. The nurses greeted her and tried to make her feel better but that didn’t work. I took her riding in her wheelchair and showed her things and the people she already knew that lived there, like Francis and Stella and Opal, she wasn’t impressed. She said she hoped she didn’t fall out of bed and get lost in the crack and her bed wasn’t even against the wall. She had a beautiful view from the big window but she was scared someone was going to get her. ( they would have given her right back). I came home about 4:30 and sat and cried my eyes out. She looked so little and old and scared and doesn’t know how to ask for anything. She can’t push the button, after all my trying to teach her. It’s so sad.

I slept this morning till 7, but I was still tired. I finished putting labels on all mama’s stuff (a BIG job) and went to Hudson, to take it all and put it all up. If looks could kill, I would have been dead. She was sitting in the big dining room with the others, in her wheelchair. She looked so mad and mean. I know she blames me for everything. I tried to talk to her and she said” What fun is this, just sitting here with nothing to do?” We rode to the sunroom where 2 ladies she knew from church were sitting and she said they belonged here, but she didn’t. Then she started to let me know that her daddy kept his daddy at home, and took care of him, till he died, and she kept throwing this up to me. It hurt me a lot. My back and neck were killing me from pushing that wheelchair so much and I had a bad headache. The little dog named Snowball came up and I sat him in her lap and he rode there, back to the big room. I told mama that I had to leave and would be back later and left her petting the dog. They told her she could have a bird in her room but she didn’t’ want one.

I got back in a bit and ran in to Doctor Jadic and we walked together to find mama. She was in the big room, eating popcorn and watching a movie, drinking punch and talking to a friend who had come by. She acted fine when they were there. Then they left and I asked her if she wanted to go outside and pushed her out but she complained of being cold and so I took her back in. Irv and Blake came by and Blake played with the dogs and cats. They had a cat named Tiger Woods that weighed 30 pounds, a big red dog named Molly and the little white dog named Snowball and lot of other ,cats. We stayed till supper and left and she didn’t say a word to me. She’s mad at me and I’m sorry ,but I did the only thing I knew to do. Another crying night at home.

We went to Hudson about noon. I knew they were having a bible study and wanted to see if she would go. I walked in the dining area and she looked at me and said” well, I wondered if you knew where I was?” I told her that I knew better than anyone. She said” well I never want to go to this again,” and I said” WHAT”? She told me that they had took her in a van to a funeral with 6 caskets with old men in them and she didn’t like it.( that’s what she got out of the church) She said she wanted to go home and I said,” you can’t go home “and she said ,“why can’t I” and I said, “cause you can’t walk” and she said ,“why can’t I walk, I’ve always walked.” I took her to her room and it was all new to her. She had never been in there before, or seen anything there before. She didn’t even know she had a room. All the bringing her stuff from home, was for nothing because she didn’t recognize any of it. They were playing bingo but she couldn’t do that either. So we looked at her birthday pictures AGAIN and she had never seen them and kept asking if Bill knew she was there and if her Sunday school class knew she was in rehab.

We put in her phone but when Irv rang it she couldn’t figure out where the ringing was coming from , so I didn’t know that this would work out. Irv rang it and handed it to her and she” talked to Bill” ,except no one was on the phone. When the aid came for supper and asked if she could walk, mama said ,“yes” and I quickly told the girl” NO ,she can’t.” Looks like they would check about the residents and not believe what they say. Then we left because I couldn’t stand it anymore. Even if she could walk, she has no mind. Another lady from church named Judi will be moving in next week. It’s sad to see them all in here. Anytime I ask mama anything ,she says, “WELL, I haven’t thought about it.” I asked if she remembered her birthday and then after thinking , she said she had it at church and had flowers and gifts and people and I told her that was her 80th birthday and she said, “Which one is this?”