This is the story of my mama’s battle with Alzheimer’s disease. It was a long, tiring time of suffering for both her and her family, especially me, her daughter and main caregiver. I was very lucky to have a husband who supported me in this and did everything he could to help. If I couldn’t do it, he did. I did all I could to for her until the very end. I’m sure I made a lot of mistakes. I lost my temper sometimes, I got tired and worn out with the same things, I got sick of going to Hudson (nursing home) but I have no regrets, because I know in my heart I did my best. I was at her side when she died, holding her, as the life drained out and she went to be with Jesus. I loved her so much and miss her everyday.

I hope that reading this story will be of help to other people who are in their own hard battle with the awful disease called Alzheimer’s. If you are facing an Alzheimer’s battle of your own, you need to know what you are facing. You need to get prepared and learn what is in your future and how to deal with it. When mama was diagnosed, we found the Alzheimer’s support group and learned from those who had been there before us. You need to know what is coming, ‘cause it will hit, and hit hard and you need to be prepared and know what to do when each stage comes.

I kept a daily blog for over three years after mama fell. Along with that blog, and the notes I had kept through the years before, I wrote this story.

Chapter One
MAMA BEFORE THE FALL

Many years ago, I had a mama who was very active in church, had a beautiful singing voice and sang in the Second Baptist Church choir for 50 years, sang solo’s in church, taught children in Sunday school, was big in WMC, was a volunteer at Hudson Nursing Home where she did sewing, and a volunteer with the Pink Ladies at the hospital. If the door was open at church, she was there. It didn’t matter for what. I never remember when she didn’t go to church. I never remember when she wasn’t singing.

Mama was a very active lady up till she was around 80 years old. Then things started to go down-hill for her. We could see things that just weren’t right and knew she was having problems remembering, and covering it up. She walked until she wore out her knees and they swelled and she used a cane. Because of the Alzheimer’s and her age, they didn’t think they should do knee replacements. But she got around ok. Other than that, she was in pretty good health.

One thing mama did, was always want to GO, didn’t matter where or when. She had been that way all her life. Every time Irv and I went anywhere, she would invite herself to go and we, being stupid, always took her. We spoiled her for years. We ALWAYS had mama in the backseat, no matter where we went for 30 years. She never thought she was imposing, and if it ever entered her mind, she didn’t care. SO, this fact will explain one reason why she did like she did when the Alzheimer’s got worse.

The director of volunteers at the hospital had to tell mama she couldn’t work anymore ’cause she was telling people that surgery patients weren’t there, and going to sleep at the desk, making a lot of mistakes, etc. She just couldn’t do the job, but it hurt mama’s feelings so bad ‘cause they didn’t want her after 17 years of service. I understood why it hurt her so much, but I also knew she couldn’t handle the job. The lady called me, after she talked to mama, and I told her I understood why they couldn’t keep her.

She was showing more and more signs of Alzheimer’s, but she still fought it and kept on trying and covering up. I took her to the doctor and she was diagnosed at about 80 years old, but we knew she had something wrong long time before that. She walked every day and was very healthy otherwise. She was put on the drug, Exelon. She was still driving and just wouldn’t give it up. She had several wrecks, all were her fault. She never broke any bones, but had some really neat black eyes and face to match, several times. She would just get well and go right back to driving. I loved her so much, but she was so hardheaded.

Mama was extra good at covering up. Alzheimer’s patients always are. If someone isn’t around them all the time, they can fool people for a long time and mama could fool them, just not me.

She had long before, stopped writing checks. She couldn’t figure out where to write what on a check, and so I bought and paid everything for her. I would go over and write out all her bills. I got my name on her checkbook and got power of attorney for her before it got so bad. I made all her doctor appointments and took her to them all. She had to go to the heart doctor ‘cause she had had a heart attack and she had to go to the eye doctor and the hearing doctor and the regular doctor. It was always something.

She got to where she just made a mess of everything she tried to do. Then she forgot how to write at all. She want4ed to send Christmas cards and I bought her some and told her I would help her address them. I went back the next day and she had messed up the whole box with scribbling. I got another box and fixed them for her. I took her to mail them, told her that I had mailed hers, and never told her that they weren’t the ones she did. She got back a lot of mail that she had addressed to herself and put the return address as who it was supposed to go to.

I bought her groceries and bought her things she could easily fix to eat, like Healthy Choice and sandwich stuff. It got to where she couldn’t fix the easy things either, and she would put metal in the microwave, microwave things much too long, and leave the stove burners on, and couldn’t follow the simplest directions. I took her a lot of meals, but I worried all the time she was going to burn the house down. I would have to check the refrigerator every week, ‘cause mama couldn’t tell if food was molded or ruined, she would eat it anyway. She couldn’t see it or smell it, both from Alzheimer’s. It tasted ok to her.

She never would take a bath or wash her clothes. Her clothes had so many stains on the, it was pitiful. In fact, I would have to sneak out her clothes and take them to my house and wash them and sneak them back in. She wore the same thing every day and never thought they were dirty. She used the same towel and wash rag over and over without washing them. Course, she didn’t wash herself much. She would get real mad if you questioned her about that or anything.

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